Release your past 

“Without freedom from the past, there is no freedom at all.” ~Krishnamurti

A man full of power and passion wanted to change his life but  in order to change he has to stand up and make a move but every time he tries to make a move he find himself burdened by something which is sucking all his energy and all his capabilities. This weight is so heavy it wont allow the man to rise and make moves to accomplish what he desire of . No matter how much the person is determined to change no matter how much strong his vision is he wont be able to move unless he releases this burden , though he might crawl but making a proper move is not possible.

This burden is nothing but your own past, yes your past ,you  carry a regret or incapability from your past on your shoulder which does not allow you to prosper because every time you try to move forward a glimpse of your past makes you concious about it. 

You might know few people who are still holding their past , they hold regrets of their past and  undoubtedly carrying their past to their future. what the don't understand is that they are ruining their present plus making every possible plan for a gloomy future.

It is easy to be in hostage of your past,
Someone treated you badly. You regret something you did or said. You can’t let it go. It clouds your present and inhibits your future.You have a hard time forgiving others or yourself for deeds of the past.Because of something that happened in your past, you have difficulty trusting, loving and accepting yourself and others.

Yes, memories and emotions from the past may haunt you and limit you, but are you getting some sort of payoff by keeping those memories alive?
For some, playing the role of the victim brings attention and possibly sympathy (i.e. “Bad things always happen to me.”) If that’s the only kind of attention this person feels they can attract, the payoff is significant and there’s little reason for the subconscious mind to want it to end.
For others, being “right” is the payback. If a person lives in a somewhat uncertain present, holding onto the concept of being “right” about something gives that person a sense of validation, control and certainty.
While releasing yourself from a negative past may seem like an obvious choice for your conscious mind, your subconscious (which controls 98% of your thoughts and actions) may go into a tailspin at the thought of letting go of something that it finds comfort or benefit in.
Consider discussing this with someone who knows you well, will be honest with you and whose counsel you can be open to and hear. Many times it’s difficult to see your own habits and thought patterns because they’re so integral to who you are.

If  you want to get over your past the best thing is to forgive , forgiveness is an act of bravery not every person in this world have courage to forgive others for the ill behaviour they have experienced. 

well if you too find it hard to forgive someone then do it for yourself as by forgiving you will not only release yourself from past regression but will be holding a clear mind window to see new era of happiness.When someone deals you a disservice, it’s hard to simply let it go. If they’ve hurt you, you can’t let them get away with it.
These are the beliefs that will keep you stuck in the past and forever tied to a person you can’t stand. What fun is that?
If someone left you in a nasty breakup or an inept boss yelled at you publicly or someone dismissed something you’ve worked hard on, it’s up to you to either take it personally and let it fester inside you or let it go because you understand that other people are dealing with their own issues.
Forgiving, letting go and releasing are all about you and not about the other person. The other person never has to know.
It’s often easier to forgive when you can truly put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
From many personal experiences, I’ve learned that bullies are simply scared and insecure people who find comfort when they can knock others down. When they were young, they may not have received the love, acceptance and respect they needed. As a result, they have a hard time giving it and operate from a place of fear and control.
If someone has been nasty to you, instead of labelling them a nasty person, consider what’s going on in their lives. People in physical or emotional pain have a difficult time being nice. Are they dealing with stresses at home or work? Are they working through an illness that they don’t want to talk about?If you were in their shoes, how would you have acted?

 

“Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.”
                                                                                                                Nelson Mandela    

Let go the past , let go the grief and learn to forgive because you have  all the rights to be happy you have all the rights to prosper , even god wants you to be happy whatever you have experienced in your past take it as an learning experience , the experience for life time which has made you more strong now ,which has widen up your vision and  the way you look at circumstances now .

There is nothing wrong in being a victim, what is wrong is treating your self as a victim . Don't be a victim of your past life let the by gone be by gone. Enjoy your life ,spent the time in things you love and with people who care for you .

                      How do you see yourself ?

       "A strong, positive self-image is the best possible preparation for success." 

                                                                                                         Joyce Brothers

Before we start lets know what does this word self Image mean. Self-Image - The idea, conception, or mental image one has of oneself. Self-Esteem - Respect or favourable image of oneself (Random House Dictionary). In lay words it means the idea one has of one's abilities, appearance, and personality. Self image is the ability to see and realise the potentials which others aren't able to see in us.It is the way we carry ourself, all are reflexes and our reaction to a particular situation depends upon the self image we carry in our mind. This self image can broaden your potentials or can break them to the extreme levels.Self-image is how you perceive yourself. It is a number of self-impressions that have built up over time: What are your hopes and dreams? What do you think and feel? What have you done throughout your life and what did you want to do? These self-images can be very positive, giving a person confidence in their thoughts and actions, or negative, making a person doubtful of their capabilities and ideas.Surprisingly, your self-image can be very different from how the world sees you. Some people who outwardly seem to have it all (intelligence, looks, personal and financial success) may have a bad self-image. Conversely, others who have had a very difficult life and multiple hardships may also have a very positive self-image.

In fact, it is precisely because low self image does not seem to be the problem, that it is so very insidious. Many people who suffer from low self image attribute their life challenges to wholly different causes. It does not even occur to them to relate their problems to how they regard themselves at the deepest level. Instead, they blame their problems on a mean boss, racial or sexual prejudice, a talent for choosing abusive love partners and so on.

In this way, the problem is externalized. However, doing this merely moves a person further away from the real problem, and consequently from the solution. Thus by disguising itself as some other more immediately visible issue, low self image is never tackled and overcome. It remains to rear its ugly head again.

Whatever challenge you face, you can rest assured that someone else has had it even worse, and yet gone on to triumph. If so, what prevents you back from doing the same? The answer must inevitably be - yourself. YOU are the primary force shaping you life. If others faced similar external challenges and triumphed, then external circumstances are NOT the primary determiners of your life. Your attitude of mind is.

our self image depends upon three factors - self confidence, self esteem and our experiences. These three factors are contextually proportionate  with each other . To explain this take it this way your experiences builds your confidence and your confidence generates your self esteem .

As we have discussed  your self image  have powers to make you or break you the only difference in two phases is of positive and negative self image. while a positive self image can help you to boost your abilities , a negative self image has power to destroy even your masterly crafted tendencies.

So what is a Positive or a negative self image ? 

Have you ever doubted your potential ,even though you know you are capable of achieving what you desire for , have your said phrases like why do I look like that , why do Its only me suffering every time and have your ever felt a break down just before approaching an  opportunity, then my friend you are carrying negative self image with you all the time . the negative self image doesn't allow you to perform you at your fullest capacity it fills you with terror ,hesitation , fear and sometimes even guilt . On the other hand  When you set and achieve goals to improve your selfimage, to commit yourself to their attainment, and to take action to bring those goals into reality, you begin to develop a more positive self-image than you ever dreamed possible. A positive self-image, in turn, reinforces your courage and confidence. You’re then capable of undertaking even more lofty and challenging goals.

Developing a positive self-image is based on the principle that each of us is the product of what we think and what we believe about our abilities. The only practical world is the one within ourselves – the world in which we develop courage and self-confidence and a more positive self-image. It’s here that we motivate ourselves to transform goals into tangible realities.

 

If self image is such a vital part of our existence and who we are is there a way to improve our self image, is there any way we can amend or fix our negative self image into a positive one. 

Well the answer is yes you always have a choice to improve your self image. All you have to do is follow a simple pattern to improve your self image. 

1. Create a Self concept : self concept simply means -

The ability to know yourself; to be able to assess your strengths, weaknesses, talents and potential.
The ability to be honest with yourself and be true to who you are and what you value.
The ability to take responsibility for your choices and actions.
The ability to love and accept yourself as you are, knowing that you can improve and develop any aspects of yourself that you choose.

2. Grant yourself the permission to make mistakes. learn from them:

Your reaction to your failures, as much as your successes, defines you. You can beat yourself up over a failure, or you can give yourself the permission to make mistakes and vow to learn from them. Let’s face it, whichever route you take, you will still make some mistakes in your life. One approach chips away at your self-esteem, the other helps you become a better person. Choose.

3. Think positively about yourself.:

 Remind yourself that, despite your problems, you are a unique, special, and valuable person, and that you deserve to feel good about yourself. Identify and challenge any negative thoughts that you may have about yourself, such as ‘I am a loser’, ‘I never do anything right’, or ‘No one really likes me’.

4.Become aware of thoughts and beliefs

Once you've identified troubling situations, pay attention to your thoughts about them. This includes your self-talk — what you tell yourself — and your interpretation of what the situation means. Your thoughts and beliefs might be positive, negative or neutral. They might be rational, based on reason or facts, or irrational, based on false ideas.

YOLO !!

First of all for those who don't know what does YOLO means , it stands for " You only lives once" this basically means that you have got one life and do whatever you what to do this time only , be who you always wanted to be , behave the way you always wanted to and achieve what you have always desired of. 

Although I have strong believe in this idea who admiring this very form of life which the god has presented us to be the most magnificent of ourselves but some how I don't connect whit this phrase which say " you only live once" well as matter of fact "we live every day of our lives and we only die once", do not you also think so .

but than a second thought comes to my mind that actually be die a more then once and we actually lives only once . 

You might be thinking I am confusing you well trust me I have no intentions of doing that just go on with your reading and you will be able to realise what wanted to share .

We die a couple of time in our life and do you know why ? Well if not physically but  mentally we kill ourself often in our life and thats only because we kill our most prestigious dreams, we scarifies our dreams for something we never wanted and for being someone we never thought we would be and at last we end up being some one who  is completely  a different personality from our very own actual self ,we just carry a body of individual of who has different plans ,different lifestyle, different personality and our actual self is buried deep inside us, that actual self calls your every day,every moment to be free but cause  we are all so busy in being in our life or I should say stuck that we never pay attention to what we actually want and what the real part of us want and even if we want to we are not able to answer these calls .

Today, after reading this just give your self 10 to 15 minutes and ask your self is this what you wanted to do ,is this what you always wanted to be and most importantly is this the way you thought your behaviour should be , if you get the answer like yes this the what I always wanted to do in my life and yes I am ready to bear all the consequences because I chose this life then trust me you are awesome and just stick to your life even if things are not going your way because at end  of your life you will have the pleasure and you will be proud that you didn't just survived your life but you actually enjoyed the life you chose for you and I am sure no one would ever want to be on the death bed and thinking I wished I would have done this or that, at least I don't want my life to end with all these regrets .

If after those 10 minutes of introspection you find your inner self yelling to be free than trust me never late to make a fresh start in your life .Life is all about enjoying every bit of being you .

Trust me there I am telling you from personal experience there is no pleasure in being trap in your own self .

This time , no suggestion this time and no action plan just go out let it go, just keep following your self, try to listen what your inner voice want you to follow , be fearless ,you have all the right to choose what you want in life.

Recognise the area of your life that  you think doesn't allow you to live freely it could be anything may be your job ,your studies, your relationship. 

So if you don't like your job change it I very well understand to take diverse route in job after giving so many years to the particular job but whats the point in being a job that doesn't give you self realization, if it is your course than trust me it the perfect time to pursue something you always wanted and if it is your relationship than just remember there is no point of being with someone by killing yourself , show some mercy to your self .

The day you will free yourself and the day you will realize what your true emotions are only and only than You could say that yes you lived that that will be the moment you'll say you lived once.

Be happy

be blessed 

and cheers to life 

 

GIVE AN ACCEPTANCE TO YOURSELF

Why do so many people feel confused about who they really are and how did the issue of personal identity become so challenging? While it may seem like you should automatically know how to be yourself, in reality that is rarely the case. why do we need approval of others to live our lives and why do we need create an impression on  someone of being someone who is completely different from what we actually are .

I know a lot of people who keep on yelling I want this and I want that or why cant I have that and  all other sort of yelling that makes me wonder  how much these people are uncomfortable in just being there selves , how desperately these people want be someone who the they are not meant to be . 

I have seen people complaining about how ugly they are or how much lazy they or how unfit they are to pick a dress for themselves , even people keep on complaining that how unsuccessful and they can't do anything but what these people doesn't understand is that they are one of the most gorgeous people on the planet, that they are awesome no matter how much ugly they think they are ,no matter how much unfit they think they are and no matter how much time they have failed they are awesome as long as they have courage to get up . you need to know this you are perfect in your own way and stop comparing your self with others, that will not gonna do any good to you , infect you never know the person you are comparing yourself may have his or her own insecurities .

Always remember you are precious the way you are , be you , love your self  as there will never be anyone else like you in the future of the universe. There has never been anyone exactly like you since human life began. That’s why being yourself is more important than anything else; certainly more than the fear that traps people into conforming.

We all have our own insecurities you, me, everyone, we all are conscious about something or other 

so if all have insecurities than why to feel Inferior and why to make the other person feel superior and dominate our lives.

Now the thing which comes out is , How Can I do that ?
Well there can't be a single rout for all of us ,so what you have to do is analyse what is that thing which is not allowing you to break your shell and you will get your solution and of-course feel free to talk to me if you ever need help , however here few common points we all nee to remember to tackle this problem .

1.Trust yourself  because if you can’t trust yourself, why should others trust you?

Being who and what you are is the most natural thing there is. To suppress it, whether through fear, yielding to social pressure, or lack of confidence always leads to trouble. That’s why millions of people today lead lives of frustration and desperation. They denied who they are in the hope that the powers that be would reward them. Their reward was mediocrity, depression and a nagging sense that life like that is scarcely worth living.

There may be a cost. Some people, even some friends, will disapprove of you as you truly are and will let you know it. There will be setbacks along the way. Yet the price for being yourself can never be as great as the price you will pay for stepping aside from your basic nature: a price paid in frustration, dissatisfaction, and the hopeless realization of all that you might have been, but now can never attain.

2. Never say or think negative about yourself.

what we often say to our self is what we are gonna get . never allow thought such as , "I never do anything right." "I'll never change." "I'm ugly." "I look terrible." "I'm dumb." "Who could ever love me? enter in your mind , why to criticize yourself as there already lot of people doing that .


3. Speak good things about yourself


In line with what the Word says about you. For example: "I am made acceptable in the Beloved." "God created me and formed me with His own hands, and God doesn't make mistakes." I like starting the day making good confessions. Perhaps you can do this while you're driving to work or cleaning house. I also encourage you to look in the mirror and say out loud, "God loves and accepts you, and so do I." You may even try hugging yourself. This is beneficial to people who have lacked love and acceptance in their lives.



4. Never compare yourself with other people.


God must love variety or He wouldn't have created us all differently—even down to our fingerprints. You'll never succeed at being yourself if you're trying to be like someone else. Other people can be a good example to you, but duplicating even their good traits will manifest differently through your individual personality.

5. Focus on your potential instead of your limitations.

Sachin Tendulkar at an early stage of his carrier was told  that he was  too short for being a good cricketer but instead of focusing on his limitations he focused on what he was good at . i.e playing cricket and now even after years of his retirement he is still known as the god of cricket.

Just keep your focus on your strengths and keep moving a head in the direction you your prosperity.

6. Get someone to talk  

Get some one who can keep you reminding of your qualities and who can keep you uplifted , you can share your daily progress and your problems with, this will definitely help you realize your true self . It can be anyone your parents ,friend or if you feel shy talking with these close ones you can talk to one of your friend on social media .

 The Great-full Gratitude

If I could offer you something so magical that it will help your prosper, make you more happier than your are now ,more healthier than you are now and more positive than you are now, plus increases your productivity ,will you be interested in such a thing?

Well if you are interested, Sorry to disappoint you but there is no such thing that  exist  for real but let me tell  all of us have something with us which  is such a pure form of power that it can get you all of these things and much more than these things. Want to know what it is? well it is...


GRATITUDE

Now most of you must be thinking what does that even mean , so let us look at the meaning of the word , the dictionary describes the word as "the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

Lets just divide this meaning into three parts :

1. the quality of being thankful

2.ready to show appreciation for kindness  

3.to return kindness

now if we focus on these points we get the quality of being thankful, which simply mean appreciating what your have rather than craving for what you could have, all you have to do is every morning just say thank you to the mighty for what all you ,when you start finding happiness in what all you have trust me that is the point from where all your worries starts to take  the exit door from your life.
Always be great full for what all you have, the position in and situation you are at because remember somewhere  in this world someone is trying harder and harder to have what all you have.

"Thank you " we all know this word since our childhood but are we really using this word well or do we even use this word . Think about it how will you feel if you help your friend with his new project or helped him in fixing his new website and all your efforts and all your hard work he leaves back without appreciating your work or without even saying thank you , I bet you wont feel like helping him again and on other hand you have your another friend who appreciated your help and offered a you thank you in a most polite way with a smile on a face and small pack of chocolate for you just to show gratitude for the help you offered him. How will you feel this time , of course you would love to help him again with even more enthusiasm than before . well if you  can get your work done without any kind of hazel and by spending almost no money than why not to use this amazing tool known as "thank you " think about it and next time appreciate the kindness of others.

Now we know how important it is to appreciate the kindness of other person as it give a feeling of ease to you and to the other person as well , the thing here is how to appreciate the kindness of others, will a thank you will do or do we need to do something more. Well the first thing you need to remember is that  your appreciation should be an genuine one and not a bogus one , just wear a healthy and a sweet smile on your face and offer your appreciation , it should not seem to be a pretended one  and also not the  one full of over flowering words, as in both the cases it may make the other person a bit of uncomfortable . Now this was the manner for offering your gratitude the next thing that comes our mind is how to do it well that we will discuss in other part of this blog .



Till than remember whenever you get a chance to express your feeling of gratitude ,just do it and remember...

"Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it."

                                                                                                               William Arthur Ward

And at last thank you so much for reading this and all my previous blogs . 

The Man Of Action

"If you really want to achieve something stop talking and start doing."

 we all have some passions hidden beneath the catastrophic chaos of our life and some dreams which are isolated their physical existence and waiting to be morphed into the absolute reality. Some ideas we want to share with the world but never did. well we all are familiar that how easy it is to say “I want to do this,” but how difficult it can be to turn that sentence into, “I did this.” we all talk the talk but never bother to walk the walk and as a consequent we fail to walk our talk .


At some or other point of our lives we have made the statement or had a thought in our mind "I am going to do this or I want to do that" but sooner or later we fall apart from our very own feeling of doing that particular thing , infect some of us never initiated the action.


The very simple Idea to resist such situation can be learned from a simple line " start small, be consistent and achieve big" , be a man of action . I humbly request you to be a man of action because there is no sincerity and prosperity in being associated as a man of all talks and no action. It is awesome and fantastic to have great accumulation of ideas but such idea are of no use without any execution.


The key is taking the very first step and trust me it doesn't matter how big or how small is your step is, a lot people never get where they want to reach because they didn't had courage to that very first step. Always remember all the masters you know now may not necessarily had started big , there are masters and there are masters who had a crumbling start.


It is easy to proclaim a dream or a goal but until you don't believe in yourself and your dream you can never and I mean never take the necessary action and most of the people who drag in their action back of their mind believe that they can not achieve their dreams.

Now if you are in need of a little inspiration to get focused on doing what you are saying you will, then try one of these methods of gaining focus, traction and results.

Clearly Define Your Objective

What exactly is it that you want to achieve? Don’t just think it: write it down and put it somewhere you will see it every day (on your refrigerator, your bathroom mirror, etc.) Vocalize your objective, too, by telling friends and family what your goal is. Also be sure to visualize yourself actually working towards your goal instead of daydreaming about the perks that will come with your accomplishment. These methods will become embedded into you and will make you more driven to successfully carrying out the tasks to get to your end point. Remember our mind works in images so the better you visualize and clearer you image is the sooner you are going to grab it, so visualize every minor detail and don't forgot to involve your senses while your visualize.

Incentivize

Reward your self for every minor accomplishment that you make , Every time you achieve your weekly schedule’s goal, treat yourself. Make it something that you don’t usually get, and bonus points if your incentive is somehow tied to your objective. If you are trying to eat healthier food, make your treat the chance to go to different healthy restaurants in your area. Or treat yourself to some “healthy" dessert, like dark fudge.

Encourage Yourself

Leave notes of encouragement around so that you are constantly being inspired to follow through on what you say you will. Think about strategically placing these notes in places where they will be seen when you are thinking about slacking off. Back to the healthy lifestyle example, put notes on your fridge and within your grocery list so that you are reminded to make good, clean decisions with your meals.

Get a Master

find someone who has already achieved the goal you are trying to achieve , hear out his stories ,learn from his lessons . Ask them the techniques and methods they used to achieve the said target.follow their advices and suggestions seriously and you will be more likely to achieve your target with more efficiency.